It's All My Fault: How I Messed Up the World, and Why I Need Your Help to Fix It by Phoenix Jordan

Author:Phoenix, Jordan [Phoenix, Jordan]
Language: eng
Format: azw3
Publisher: Project Free World
Published: 2014-06-01T04:00:00+00:00

8

The Journey Begins with a Single Step

The past few years of my life have been very different from those of almost everyone I’ve ever known. It’s been a wild rollercoaster ride that, at times, has left me face down in the mud, feeling unsure if I would ever gain the strength to bounce back up again. In the first chapter, you got a chance to see a glimpse into the window of some of my darkest moments. What I’ve yet to describe is how I got to that place, how I got out of that place, and where this road leads next.

After leaving Mexico in the second chapter, I had seen my first glimpses of self-actualization. I was extremely fortunate to have had all of the right conditions line up to allow me to overcome many of the self-doubts and insecurities that had kept me stuck in my shell up until that point. Life outside of the shell felt like I was not even living in the same universe. It was as if I had previously been living inside a black and white television set with bad reception; and then suddenly, life shifted into high definition television with a crystal clear picture, vibrant colors, and booming sounds. This new level of freedom was something that I embraced, and made the most of day in and day out. In many ways, it was infectious. I could sense it rubbing off on those around me. This would all change, however, when I officially became a civil engineer.

At first, it seemed like it would be great. I had multiple offers to choose from, and actually received a signing bonus months before I even started working. I thought: “This is ridiculous! What am I, LeBron James or something?” I began thinking about all of the possibilities; all of the things I would do with my newfound money. This was completely new to me. I had a strong scarcity-based paradigm engrained into me from years upon years of having to live tight with money. Finally, I thought, those days would be over for good. It was now time for me to ascend into the ranks of those who never had to worry about money. I wanted to know what it felt like to experience that feeling. If I wanted something small for myself, I could go buy it. I could do some really cool things to give back. My first item of business was to do some research into a philanthropic idea I had. I was interested in finding out if sports could be used as a motivating force to improve grades for children in underprivileged areas. Since so many kids love sports, and they were such an essential part of my childhood as well, I thought of an idea: What if I purchased a bunch of tickets to a pro football game, and created a raffle -- whereby the students in a chosen class who scored an 80% or higher on all of their

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